Something Smarter (and more enjoyable) than 'Shoulding'
When thinking about what to write for this month, I came up with several topics.
I’d write a couple of paragraphs for each, then felt it wasn’t quite what I wanted to write about, and scrapped it and started again.
This happened 4 times with 4 different topics.
See, I made a decision years ago that the whole point of creating my business was to do what I loved. So I made what seems like an obvious choice that if something doesn’t bring me joy, I don’t do it.
And those topics I tried writing for this month’s blog post weren’t fun for me to write about.
My intention with each blog post is to share value with you, something you’re able to actually try out and implement in your own life however you see fit, as if I were your coach. The other goal is to have fun doing it :-)
So the idea of “shoulds” came up, and it was perfect. Because prior to writing this post, I had the following thoughts:
“I should write a post about xyzzy
“I should get my newsletter out on the first
“I should, I should, I should
Once I catch myself ‘shoulding’ I step back and ask “Do I have to? Do I want to?”
There are a lot of things a lot of us think we ‘should do’, but really,
at the end of the day, are we happy about the shoulds in our life, in our days, in our weeks? And if not, why are we doing them?
I love the quote ‘we aren’t meant to just work, pay bills and die’.
I think it’s powerful because when we hear it, some part of it rings true, and we feel free to pursue our happiness and passions unapologetically…because we’re not just meant to work, pay bills and die.
So if you find yourself shoulding too, I highly recommend taking some time and asking yourself the following and see what comes up:
“What do I feel I should do?
“Why do I feel I should do this?
“Who said I should do this?
“Do I really believe I should do this? Do I have to do it in this way?
“What will happen if I don’t?
“What is another way to achieve a great outcome without this ‘should’
“What’s another way to achieve great outcome with more fun and joy?
When coaching my clients one on one or in a group, I don’t tell them what they should or shouldn’t do. We all have the answers within us and we all have our intuition to guide us. And asking powerful questions, like the ones above, leads to powerful answers and insights to guide each of us to new ways of getting things done in an even better and more enjoyable way.
And isn’t that more of what life’s about?
Try it out, lemme know what you think in the comments below. Life’s too short to be full of shoulds.
