Becoming Resilient AF
2020 is halfway over, oh My!! And to say it’s been quite a year is an understatement.
As a life coach, I wish I had all the answers for all the tough questions and situations we’re facing. But I don’t. No one does because the answers are within each of us.
And the answers may be different from person to person, but I trust that our souls know what we each should do next day to day, week to week, to move us right along. Sometimes the action of the day may be to rest. Other days it may be to take some sort of action. Only you’ll know in your heart of hearts.
If you’re finding yourself stuck, struggling, at a standstill during this time, trust that that pause is ok. Let that pause comfort you. If you’re grieving, grieve. Take care of yourself, nurture yourself, comfort yourself. Say kind things to yourself. Take this time to cultivate immense self-love, self-compassion and grace.
If you’re finding yourself ready to move forward but bouncing back seems easier said than done, I’d love to introduce you to my new “Resilient AF” framework.
Yup. You heard that right.
Resilient. As. F********ck.
Around 4 years ago, I experienced one of the toughest times in my life. I had so much uncertainty and trouble gathering momentum to do the things I knew I needed to do to get me closer to my goals.
My goals felt like they didn’t matter anymore. This was before I started on the life coaching path, and was at a point where I had to figure out how to flip flop my mindset & get going or go on feeling miserable.
Since that point, I’ve come across and have used a lot of tools, both from my life coaching program, as well as from other courses. I’ve kept what works for me, and tucked the rest in my toolbox in case I need them at another time.
My ‘Resilient AF’ framework introduces you to some of the tools I’ve used myself this year with allllllllllllllll that’s going on to help me feel the things (vs. suppressing) and then move on to get back up and keep going towards my goals and dreams.
Because our dreams matter and it’s always within our power to make ‘em happen. Our souls placed our desires on our hearts for a reason.
So let’s get into it:
The Resilient AF Framework:
Pillar 1: The Mind
To me, the mind is where our ‘stuckness’ starts.
We feel stuck because of what we’re thinking, how we’re thinking and because of the meaning we give things. If we change our mindset, our thoughts, and the meaning we give things, we can change our lives.
How: Try tapping, aka the Emotional Freedom Technique. Tapping on specific acupressure points while saying thoughts you have emotional charge around will decrease the emotional charge of that thought. You give your feelings a voice and through the tapping process, can release them. As you start to feel better, you can replace these with positive, more empowering statements. I created this tapping video on being the change you can try out (and a ‘how -to’ video here).
Pillar 2: The Body
Our body holds soooooooo much wisdom and power for changing our state of being and how we feel. One thing we always have access to and can use anytime, any place is our breath.
How: Belly (aka Diaphragmatic) Breathing/Breathwork
Simply increase the duration of your inhalations and exhalations, taking in more air as you breath in so that the belly expands out more than it was. If you can, breath in through the nose for a count of 3, and out through the nose for a count of 4-6. This sends a signal to the nervous system that you want it to relax. And it will.
Pillar 3: The Soul
Yup. Try to connect to that something or someone that is infinite and supportive. It can be God/Goddess/the Universe/Source/Spirit/Infinite Intelligence or Humanity as a whole. This helps with feeling connected, and feeling connected gives us hope and inspiration to get up and keep going.
How: Depending on your spiritual beliefs, use the tools you have in your spiritual toolbox that allow you to connect with something greater. If no specifics come to mind, you simply close your eyes and be still, placing a hand on your heart, and breathing from this space, knowing that the intelligence that reminds your heart to beat and your lungs to keep inflating and deflating without you having to consciously tell them to do so is the same intelligence that supports your life and you being here, right here, right now. It has your back.
It’s a pretty simple framework, but it’s mighty and can shift you from feeling stuck & struggling to Un.Effing.Stoppable.
If you’re interested in implementing this in your life on more than one occasion, you can download the Resilient AF Mini Checklist here.
So know I’d love to hear from you! I’d love to know in the comments below what your resiliency tools are!
