Go with the Flow by Also Going with the Ebb': 10 Suggestions to Navigate Life's Curveballs & Rough Patches.
“Things don’t happen to you, they happen for you.”
I recently learned about the state of ‘flow,’ and have experienced it many times before even knowing it was called that.
Chances are you too have heard of ‘Ebb and Flow,’ both in relation to the ocean and life.
When we are in a state of flow, it feels so dang good!! Things seem to be lining up for us, we get work done quickly and easily perhaps, and time is flying by as we have a blast. We all experience flow in different ways.
But I’m here to actually chat a little bit more about what to do when we find ourselves on the flip side; the state of ‘ebb.’
What is 'Ebb'?
‘Ebb’ can take on different forms for all of us. It might be feeling tension in your body from working too much at a computer or your desk. It might be going through a rough patch in your health journey or relationship. It could be a transition of somesort….when time seems to be crawling and you just want to get over it/through it already.
When things around us aren’t going our way, I’ve found we have a tendency to want to get out of it and away from it as quickly as possible. I’ve definitely been there myself, so completely understand that feeling first hand.
Truth is, life is full of a bunch of ebbs and flows, both great in their own way. And I’ve found that when I “go with the flow” of being in ebb (visualize floating on your back in water, not resisting, just chilling), I end up learning and growing A TON, and actually get back to a state of flow faster, (and who doesn’t want that?!).
So let's dive in:
10 suggestions when you find yourself in a state of 'ebb'
Change your perspective about the situation: Instead of resisting and wanting to get out of an uncomfortable situation as quickly as possible (which is a natural first tendency since we don’t like being uncomfortable), decide to know and trust that whatever you’re going through can be an experience that’s here to serve and teach you something. Think of this experience as your teacher, who is giving you a lesson that you can keep for the rest of your life! What a gift
Ask Questions: This ties into step 1. Instead of asking “why me, why this, etc,” instead choose to ask “what can I learn from this? How can this situation/experience help me grow as a person? How can this knowledge benefit me in the future?”
Take Care of Yourself: Move your body in a way that feels good, drink plenty of water, eat delicious nutritious meals, light your favorite candles, take a bubble bath, go to bed at a reasonable hour, take deep breaths, treat yourself to a mani/pedi (do it yourself or go out to get one done), laugh (laugh a lot), etc! You can do any or all of the above, plus any other goodies you think of that are health promoting.
Enliven your 5 Senses to Feel Grounded in the Present: Ideas include playing your favorite music to lift your mood, petting & cuddling with your favorite fur baby, enjoying some aromatherapy, like essentials oils, flowers, or using natural body products, watch an uplifting, funny or inspiring movie or documentary, closing your eyes and experience the sound, breeze, sun etc while sitting outside, or paying attention to and enjoying the taste of every bit when eating.
Take Time to Journal: Write about what you’re experiencing, doing and learning. The more you get out of your head and onto paper (especially the thoughts that are on repeat), the more active and creative the mind becomes to come up with possible solutions you might be searching for.
Shift your Focus: Focus on what’s going WELL and THRIVING in your life; building on step 5, list the first 3-5 things that come to mind in your journal. If you want to keep going, that’s fantastic!! You can make it a daily habit and ‘feel-good’ booster! This is one of my favorite energizing practices that lifts any negative mood I may find myself in.
Have a support network in place & Spend Time with Loved Ones: call up a trusted friend, meet a family member for lunch or cup of tea or enlist the help of a therapist, counselor or coach. When things are a bit rough, we can have a tendency to want to isolate ourselves. Spending time alone to reflect is absolutely ok, but be sure it isn’t the only thing you do. We are fulfilled by love and connection to others, and talking about what we are going through with someone we trust is tremendously helpful.
Contribute to a Cause Outside Yourself: take a break from your ebb state to find time to contribute in a way that feels good to you! It can be participating in a community service project, dropping off donations, going to a local animal shelter to take some pups for a walk, or searching for local, national and/or global causes you’d like to make financial contribution to (or find other ways to help!). When we serve others, it also boosts love, connection, and purpose, all of which makes us feel good!
Focus on your Breath: During stressful times, we have a tendency to be in 'fight or flight' mode, with our nervous system heightened, resulting in shallow breathing. A great way to change this is to set a timer for 1 minute, close your eyes and lengthen your inhales and exhales, focusing on spending a second or two longer on breathing out; this has been shown to calm our nervous systems, and a calm nervous system cultivates a calm mind and energy. Repeat this as often throughout the day as you’d like, or spend a longer interval of time focusing on your breath.
Lastly, choose to trust and know that this season, this phase of ‘Ebb,’ isn’t forever. Visualize yourself on the other side: The perfect follow up after your breathing practice is to sit for another few minutes, and visualize how you feel and how life looks once this ebb phase is over. There are no limits, think of all the amazing, happy things you possibly can, and really feel in to that now, enjoying it, and know you can return to this feeling anytime.
Now I’d love to hear what you think! Comment below or email me at hello@jasmineraecoaching.com to let me know what you do when you find yourself in a state of ebb, and what helps you get back to a state of flow!
xo, jasmine
